Day #12 - American Consulate 9/26/11

Dear Friends and Family,

Today we met our guide Aron in the lobby at 9:00am. We head off in a van to the American Consulate in Guangzhou with another family that was actually from another agency. We are the only two families staying at the Garden Hotel who had their consulate appointments today. Matthew thought it was so cool when we explained that when we are in the American Consulate, we are actually in the United States. I have to tell you that I was so happy to see the American flag at the consulate. It was a beautiful sight! It was rather peculiar, though, because the American Consulate is just using two floors of a business building. I was prepared for a very official looking building, but it was kind of a mall on the bottom two floors, and then the American Consulate on the upper two floors. Unfortunately, you are not allowed to take any electronic devices or cameras into the consulate. The other picture I have is in my heart :-). We had to show our passports to get into the consulate and go through metal detectors and put our stuff on a conveyor belt to be x-rayed. When we got in, we waited in a waiting room while 11 other families drifted in with their new children. I recognized MANY of them from the medical clinic and from our flight to Guangzhou from Changsha. I saw at least one other baby there with cleft lip and palate, and it is strange now how I just zone in and feel an instant connection with these families! At 10:00am, one of the employees behind a window (it kind of looked like a bank with tellers) told us it was time to take our oaths. We had to stand up, raise our right hands, and basically take an oath that all of the documentation we had provided was true and accurate. We all cheered afterwards :-). Then the employee went on to explain that our child would become an American citizen as soon as they land on United States soil. Sooo cool! Lily will automatically become a citizen of the United States when we enter San Fransisco airport. Then we waited while families were individually called up. We were third, and the officer needed to see Lily and Dave signed for our family. That was it! They will keep Lily's passport until tomorrow, when Aron will pick it up with Lily's visa stuck inside of it.

That is why our flight has to be late tomorrow. We must pick up her passport and visa after 3:30 pm tomorrow before we can depart from China. Aron has been a terrific guide. CWTS (China Women's Travel Services, the agency that handles all of the in country guidance and arranges our days) really has this down to a science. Every day we have a schedule and Aron makes sure we make it to all of our appointments with our appropriate documents. It would be impossible to do this on our own.

It was a bit of a zoo in the consulate, but they had a play area for kids. Lily was getting antsy and wanting to walk everywhere. I fed her pretzels and played with her on some of the play equipment.

When we got back to the hotel, we bought MacDonald's for lunch. I know, I know - this is getting disgusting, huh? I think that I have lost 5 pounds since I have gotten here, and probably my cholesterol is up 100 points from all the fried food we are eating :-(. We retreated Lily for lice and scabies (you are supposed to repeat the treatment 7 days later to prevent reinfestation. Shivers.) We brought the lunch back to our room and then Lily, Dave and I took a nap. The boys played on the iPad and watched a movie.

We were meeting our group at 2:30pm to go back to Shamian Island for some shopping. The rest of our group who adopted children over the age of 2 had to go back to the Island to go get their child's TB test read at the clinic. Since Lily is under 2, she did not need a TB test, but Aron said we could come along so that we could go shopping on the Island and take a cab back to the hotel at night.

This was a lot of fun! As I said before, Shamian Island really caters to adoptive families. It is very pretty there, and most people can speak some English who own stores there. We walked around with the Ramella family and the Reeds and I bought 3 pairs of squeaky shoes for Lily! They are so adorable and so affordable (between 5-8 USD apiece). I also bought some rag dolls from a store called A Gift From China which is also a charity. The profits go towards caring for the disadvantaged in China. They are really cute and soft, and the dolls are wearing little Chinese outfits.

For dinner, went to Lucy's. A very good dinner! Matthew had a cheeseburger, Nathan had grilled cheese, Dave had peanut butter and jelly (can you tell someone is missing the U.S.?) and I had spaghetti bolognaise. They even had a baby meal for Lily - rice noodles in egg flower soup. Then came the not so fun part of trying to hail a cab. We are pathetic suburban Californians :-(. We had a hard enough time finding a cab, and then most of them were occupied, and then the few that were empty seemed to slow down for us and then drive off without stopping. Dave speculated it was because our family is so large? I don't know.

We were getting hot and sweaty and tired. Finally, we walked to the Victory Hotel (another hot spot for adoptive families) and asked the bell boy in front to help us. He was so nice and hailed a taxi for us. The taxi driver was nice, too, and asked us where our family was from. When we told him that we were from the United States, he smiled and looked at our kids and said, "They still look Chinese." That was a compliment :-).

After we got back to the room the kids had baths and went off to bed. I am going to start packing after I finish this update.
Tomorrow night we begin the long journey home. Our flight from Guangzhou to Hong Kong will be at 10:40pm. That flight is only an hour. Then we have a 50 minute layover to make it onto our next flight which is from Hong Kong to San Fransisco. That will be a 12 1/2 hour flight.

Please pray for our flight back. For safety. For timeliness, so that we can make our connection. I am also getting anxious about how the kids will all do (especially Lily) on the long red-eye flight. I hope that she can rest and sleep some. There will be little room to walk around, so I hope that she will be comfortable and not too stressed. That I can find peace in the midst of what could be a very very long day. Can you tell travling makes ME stressed? Yes, yes, it does.

It has been a wonderful journey. We have been out of our comfort zone, for sure, but it has been so worth it. Our Lily-bug is so worth it! She just gives us lots to be thankful for. The boys are all loving her so much. Aaron has really stepped up, and seems to have grown up so much in just a matter of days. He looks like a giant next to her. I have been taking extra time to be deliberate about giving him more TLC, kisses and hugs.

Lily has learned a few things from us already. Her favorite thing right now is clapping! Any time we are smiling or happy, she will start clapping and looking around for anyone to start clapping with her. She has also learned how to do a high 5. The last thing is that I will point at the overhead light and say, "Dun dun!" (which means "light" in Mandarin). She will raise her hands up and look up too. Next we are trying to teach her to wave to people to say hi and bye. These are such basic basic things that we take for granted, and they are all new to her. Dave and I were just remarking how these are things that a 9 month old can do, and they are new to her. We are happy to see her learning little things by baby steps. She has been crying the last 3 nights when it is time to go to bed. It is as if she is saying she does not want to go to sleep. Or maybe she is remembering how it was to fall asleep in the orphanage or at her foster family's house. Maybe she is confused about her surroundings. I don't know. I lay right next to her or sling her to sleep, but she has cried a little each night. After she falls asleep, though, she is sound asleep and will sleep through until the next morning. A couple of times she has cried in her sleep -but has not woken up. I can only imagine what she is dreaming about or remembering. May the Lord heal her and bring her comfort and security.

Ok - I had better go.

Photos:
1) Picture in front of Starbucks
2) An action pic of Lily doing her favorite thing - clapping! Yay! We are going home!
3) Lily with french fry crumbs on her chin
4) The quality of this picture is awful, but it is on Shamian Island. These statues are a famous landmark there at the park. I have my stroller next to the statue with her stroller :-)

Miss you all!

Love,
Chenning

Day #11-Guangzhou Safari Park

Day #10 - Medical Examination

Dear Friends and Family,

A long stressful day!

We got up at 7:30, and actually had to wake up Nathan and Lily to go down to breakfast. Remember that we didn't get into our beds until past midnight after our little adventure at the airport! We had to meet our guide, Aron (who is a woman by the way) in the lobby at 9:00am to take Lily to her medical examination. This is something that all adopted children must go to before they are released to go home to the States. The clinic is governed by the American Consulate.

Breakfast was incredible. And overwhelming. Incredible because there are SO many adoptive families here at the Garden. Well, actually in Guangzhou because we all have to go through Guangzhou (where the American Consulate is) in order to go home to the United States. It was so wonderful and refreshing and encouraging to see so many families with their beautiful new additions to their families! There are 6 other families from BAAS (Bay Area Adoption Services, which is our agency) that are staying here, not to mention the other families that are here with other agencies. Anyway, it was so cool to see parents interacting and loving on their precious children. I love it! We didn't have much time to eat :-(. We were so late, and the buffet is large - there are more things than you can imagine that you could want to eat for breakfast. Western food like and made to order omelet bar, fresh waffles being made, sausage and ham and oatmeal - and then there is Asian foods like congee, sticky rice wrapped in lotus leaves, smashed bean buns, and miso soup. Too bad we didn't have more time. The dining room is right next to the 5 story waterfall that is at the Garden. Fancy fancy.

We met in the lobby and enjoyed talking to some of the other families. I have yet to meet one family that are not believers! It is such an amazing testimony of how the Lord has touched each of our lives to add a child to the family through adoption :-). Love it!

We took our big bus to Shamian Island where the medical clinic is. Shamian Island is a man made island in Guangzhou. It is beautiful and caters to adoptive families. There are stores all around with cute kids clothing and toys. The clinic is there, as well as nice restaurants and a park with a playground that is very well kept. First we had to take visa photos of our children. Then we waited outside while they were being developed. Afterwards, we got in line at the medical clinic for the exams. Each child needed to go through 3 steps - 1) Height, and weight. 2) Ear Nose and Throat. 3) Medical Exam. This was extremely stressful :-(. Imagine 50 families at this clinic. No one has appointments. One father remarked, "It's like a deli." And that's right. No numbers, you just kind of get in line and wait for the next station to usher you in on a first come and first served basis. Babies and children crying, hoards of people, and not much to do in there at all for the kids so you can imagine how happy they were to wait for their turns.

Lily got weighed and measured. She is 81 cm tall (which is 50th percentile - told you she was tall), 8.6 kilos (about 19 pounds, which is below the curve on the growth chart, less than 3rd percentile). Yep, shrimp bait. She did pretty well for this part. Didn't love it, but didn't cry either.

Next, we went to the ENT station. There, the nurse did a hearing test. Not very sophisticated. Basically, Lily sat on my lap, and she used a squeaker toy and would observe to see if she would turn her head. She did :-). Then she looked in her eyes and used a tongue depressor to look in her mouth. Pretty quick and easy.

Now the last part - the medical examination. This was rough, mainly because we had to wait and wait. Dave stayed in the waiting room with the other 3 kids. Fortunately, there was a tv there with Tom and Jerry on to entertain the siblings. I waited with Lily in the sling for probably an hour :-(. She was getting totally stressed out and restless. She wanted out of the sling, but when I put her down, she would want me to walk her somewhere and of course we could not get out of line. I was getting totally sweaty and worn out waiting for our turn. I was also feeling at a loss because Lily was doing some "orphanage" type behavior like rocking back and forth and throwing herself backwards. Poor thing. I tried to bounce her around and play with her. She ended up crying and sobbing in the sling. This is the first day that she has really cried. It wasn't out of control, but it was sad. And I was feeling stressed as well. But finally of course, our turn did come around. The doctor listened to her heart and looked at her hernia (she has a hernia on her right side that is unrepaired still, this is her other special need). Then we left. Woohoo!

I was ready to get back to the hotel asap. We got back, Dave made a run to Burger King to get take out. I gave Lily a bottle and rocked her to sleep. After lunch in the room, I took a nap, too. I needed that. I felt MUCH better afterwards.

We met the Ramellas in the lobby at 5 to go to dinner. Guangzhou is new to us, but we walked to Trust Market (yes, I am serious) to buy bottled water and snacks. Then we went to KFC right next door for some dinner, and then to Haagan Daas (!) for dessert!!! The ice cream was more than our dinner. But it was gooooood. Lily did great! She rode comfortable in the Ergo, and ate and played at dinner.

We saw a disturbing sight on the way back. Right outside a clothing store for children, there was a young beautiful Chinesewoman who had a sleeping baby in a sling. She had a stoic but sorrowful look on her face. It was downcast - she did not make eye contact with anyone. In her free hand she held a bucket,she was silently and wordlessly pleading for money. In the bucket I saw lots of little bills. Behind her was a man playing a Chinese musical instrument (er hu, I think it is called). He also did not make eye contact, and it was the saddest music. It was really a haunting sight. All these people bustling around shopping for clothes for their children, and this woman and her child just standing in this circle of sorrow right on the side walk.

Lily had trouble going down to sleep. It took her a long time. She cried some, and then was playing and climbing all over me and clapping and kicking. I am not sure if she is still recovering from all the changes, or if she is feeling more free now to show her true colors or what. Anyway, pray for me. After about an hour of that, I decided to sling her and walk around a bit. She finally went down - phew!

Pictures:
1) Waiting for Lily's visa photo to be developed
2) Picture of the clinic from the outside - yes, that is Dave!
3) Like my fake smile as we were in line for what felt like forever for the last part of Lily's medical exam?
4) This one if from yesterday - dinner at Pizza Hut.

Day #9 - Embroidery Museum and Travel to Guangzhou 9/24/11

Dear Friends and Family,

I am a bit late on our daily e-mail, or as Dave calls it, "The Daily Chenning." :-)
It has been a rough 24 hours!

Yesterday morning we met Jian at 10:00 am to go to the Embroidery Museum in Changsha. The Ramellas (ha - I finally know the last name of our beloved traveling buddies John and Judy) came with us. The embroidery museum was very small and simple, but it had stunning embroidery artwork that you could hardly believe was embroidered. In Changsha, their specialty is embroidering tigers. There was a piece of embroidery that took 2 people 2 years to complete - and it was incredible. You could see the directionality of the tiger's fur, and the eyes of the tigers were intense and realistic looking. The boys found the museum pretty interesting as well, but they were getting bored at the end :-). The docents and souvenir store attendants were admiring all of our children. Some would come up and hug Aaron, or pick up Gracie (Judy's older daughter). Neither of the kids was too pleased with this. It is a different way - personal space in China is kind of unheard of. The other day at KFC, I nearly got run over by people behind me in the ladies' room line. I had three kids with me and the lady behind me was seriously trying to push ahead of me. I wanted to say, "Can you see that I have 3 kids with me who need to pee? Please don't push ahead of me. They really REALLY need to go!" When the door opened to the free stall, I literally dashed in with the three kids before the lady behind me could. It is hard not to get upset, but I have realized that this is just the norm here.

In the afternoon, we tried to eat up all of our snacks, and then let Lily have a nap. We finalized our packing as well, as Jian was coming at 4pm to take the Ramellas and us to dinner and then to the airport for our flight to Guangzhou which was at 8pm. We went to Pizza Hut, and it was probably one of the nicer dinners we have had here. We had pizza and pasta. Jian was playing cards with the all of the kids. We left for the airport at 5:40 and arrived shortly after 6:00pm.

This is where the craziness began.

When it was our turn to check in, Jian brought out passports up and there seemed to be a problem. The ticketing agents took forever, and then Jian had to take our passports to the supervisor. We were worried that there was something wrong with Lily's passport that we had just received that afternoon. Thoughts that we could be stuck in Changsha and miss all of our appointments in Guangzhou swirled in my mind. Finally, they tell us that by law there is a limit to the number of lap baby tickets they can sell on each flight. For this flight, the limit was 5 - and they sold 7! Guess who was left in a lurch?

It was very frustrating. The agents kept calling people and discussing among themselves. Jian kept on them. But we were in the dark as to what was going on. We could not believe that China Southern did this! And of course it was a full flight, so there was not even an extra seat for them to give us. Our friends, the Ramellas, were waiting and praying for us. They did not want to get on the plane without us. Their daughter, Lily, is over 2, so she had a seat that they purchased. They didn't have the same problem as us. Finally FINALLY, it was decided that the boys, Lily, and I would get on the flight. And Dave would give his seat to Lily and he would take the high speed train to Guangzhou. Matthew and Nathan burst into tears. They were so distraught. Matthew said, "But I will be so worried about you, Daddy! What if something happens to you?" Poor guys. I was fuming! We had an appointment the next morning in Guangzhou at 8:30 to take Lily to her medical exam. We HAD to get to Guangzhou. We prayed for Daddy, and went through security. The agent who escorted us said that when the boys started to cry, she wanted to cry, too. Yeah, me three.

I don't want to get into too many details - but our flight was delayed, so Dave ended up arriving at the Garden Hotel in Guangzhou where we are staying just 5 minutes after we arrived. The flight was 1 hour (and it was a teeny plane), and the train ride 3 hours. But with the delay and so forth, it ended up being nearly the same. We staggered into our rooms at about 12:30am. The boys had slept on the short flight, but not Miss Lily. She was into everything, and starting to throw herself backwards and rocking back and forth and in general making me very tired and wishing we were on terra firma. I think she was stressed out a bit (who wasn't) by the whole ordeal. Thank the Lord for John and Judy! Of course even the seats for our family were not together :-(. Don't get me started. So it was me traveling with 4 children and only two of the seats were assigned next to each other. Thank the Lord that together we were able to maneuver things so that Matthew and Nathan were behind John and Judy in row 5, and Lily, Aaron and I were just a couple of rows back in row 7. At one point, the steward was wondering if he could have Aaron sit by himself somewhere else. I looked at him like, "You have GOT to be joking." I said, "He is 4 years old. I HAVE to be next to him." Aaron was asleep when the plane landed, so I had Lily int he Ergo (still awake, mind you), and then I had to carry Aaron down the plane, onto the transfer shuttle, and through the terminal to the baggage claim :-(. John and Judy were helping so much already by keeping track of my other two, and they both had their hands full holding their sleeping children. It was a bit nuts. We lost one of Aaron's shoes on the way - and there was no NO way I could go back and get it.

Suffice it to say, we will not be flying China Southern anytime soon. And also, at the end of the day - I am just thankful for God giving me John and Judy to be there to help with the kids. And also that we all were safely reunited with Dave in the lobby of our beautiful hotel. I thank the Lord that we were able to get to Guangzhou all in one piece and not have to miss any of the appointments. God is good!

The kids went straight to bed. We had to request a rolling bed from the hotel staff, and then Dave and I turned in for the night as well. We had to get up this morning and meet everyone in the lobby by 9:00.

I am very late in this update, so I will stop here.

Please continue in your prayers. We are in the latter half of our trip. We will be flying back on Tuesday night!

We still have some appointments to go to. I will try to write tomorrow about the medical appointments this morning.

Lily is playing in the trash can right now :-). Taking stuff out, putting it back in. It's all good. I took out everything disgusting.

The kids are in PJ's and bathed.

Sorry, no photos tonight. I am too tired and I can't find the cable to connect everything. Hopefully tomorrow!

Love,
Chenning

Day #8 - Yuelu Academy 9/23/11

Dear Friends and Family,

Yesterday morning we met our guide, Jian, downstairs in the lobby at 9:30. We were off to Yuelu Academy. Yuelu Academy is a famous institute of higher learning founded in 976. It is very famous - one of the most famous things here in Hunan. There were many tourists there - but they were all Chinese tourists (except for us). It is very beautiful - although not kept very well. It is no longer being used as a school - but sometimes lectures are given there still. It was amazing to look around and think that this was built over 1000 years ago! I could just imagine back in the day, scholars walking back and forth through the courtyards with their robes on and memorizing their lessons.

We get a lot of stares here in China - and at Yuelu Academy it is no exception. Why do people stare? I think it is because we have so many children. I was joking with Dave that we are like Brangelina - except without our body guards to keep people at bay. Seriously, people will come right up to us and start asking us questions in Chinese - How many children do you have? Are these all your children? Where are you from? You have three boys? You are so lucky! Did you dream of having a girl? Is that why you have her? It is crazy. Even when we walk into the stores near the hotel - same deal. It makes me not want to go out. But I am so SO SO glad that we brought the whole family. It just would not be the same without everybody. Our friends, John and Judy, get stares, too - because they are a Caucasion couple with 2 little Chinese girls. People were even taking pictures of our party at Yuelu Academy.

Lily is keeping us busy! She has now come more out of her shell and wants to "walk" everywhere! Sometimes she will be content to be in the sling, but she will let me know she wants down by pushing against me and saying, "Mmmmm! Mmmm!" Thankfully I have lots of helpers to hold her hands and support her as she goes everywhere. In the hotel room after her nap, she would take us to the door and indicate that she wanted to go out. Too bad there isn't anywhere to go! I am getting a little worried about the plane flight home. Hopefully it will be better since it is a red eye and she can sleep. Otherwise, we will be cruising the aisles :-(.

We had a lunch of instant noodles and snacks. Like I said yesterday, eating out is stresssful - so sometimes it is easier just to load up at the breakfast buffet, eat lunch in our rooms and then have a good dinner. Thankfully, my boys like "oodles of noodles," and Matthew especially is a homebody and never wants to go anywhere. I feel cooped up and out of my element, but the alternative of exploring the city is daunting (and would invite more stares and comments). After Lily's nap, we did venture out a couple of blocks. It was interesting because we walked down one alley way near the hotel - and there were little produce and butcher shops there. The hotels and high rises are so modern - and then there are these sights that are right nearby that are so antiquated. We witnessed a woman slicing a still wriggling fish with a cleaver right down it's back on a bloody butcherblock set in what looked like a plastic washtub. And Nathan - agog while watching this, nearly stepped on a mesh bag on the floor that was full of live frogs!

For dinner, we met John and Judy and their two girls downstairs again at Good Street. It was our last dinner in Changsha and at the Hua Tian Hotel. Tonight we fly out to Guangzhou. This will be Lily's first experience flying. It is strange to think of all the firsts that she must be going through. So many things that we take for granted and do every day - riding in a car, being out in the city, watching television. . . and even something like being fed on demand, having snacks galore, being spoiled with french fries, waking up and opening your eyes and seeing your mom right there. She smiled today when I brought her to the adjoining room after she had woken up and had her diaper changed. She saw her brothers who were playing cards, and greeted them with a smile. It was like she was saying, "There they are! Hey guys!"

Many of you have asked how Aaron is doing. He is doing wonderfully! Of course, everyone is in a kind of altered universe here. The boys are so happy because basically they get to eat as many snacks and play on the iPad and DS pretty much as much as they want to. We will see what happens when we get home and routines come back into play. For now, they are enjoying their debauchery. I am enjoying, too, letting go and relaxing our rules :-).

Ok - that's about it. We meet downstairs in a few minutes to go to the Embroidery Museum. In the afternoon we check out and go pick up our documents from the Civil Affairs Office and then head to the airport.

Our photos:
1) Lily and I at Yuelu Academy
2) Matt and Nathan smiling at Yuelu Academy
3) Lily, my brown eyed girl
4) Sleeping in the sling

Love,
Chenning

Day #7 - Martyr's Park 9/22/11

Hi Friends and Family,

Yesterday, we met Jian in the lobby to go do some local sightseeing in Changsha. She took us to Martyr's Park. It was really nice to be away from the hotel and the bustle of the city. It was (more) quiet there - and green! One thing I have noticed in the this city and in Tianjin is that there just really is not a lot of green. The cities are pretty much grey - with a haze of grey in the air as well. Martyr's Park is a memorial to those who have lost their lives for a cause, or their country, or fellow man. There was a monument (it's in one of my photos) that had a shrine inside and photos of some of the martyrs. The park is HUGE. There is a pond where you can go paddleboating (like the park we went to in Tianjin), and there are even county fair type rides in another section of the park. Throughout the park we could see many people (mainly seniors, but there were also younger people and some children) playing cards on picnic benches, singing karaoke (with the whole set up, mic, speaker and everything!), playing instruments, dancing, and doing tai chi. We got to walk around and also feed the koi fish that were in the pond. The kids loved that. Lily was not so interested in the fish, but kept trying to drop my lipbalm dangerously close to the water's edge. Lily likes to play these "dropping" games. We will give her an object, she will drop it, and then indicate she wants to have it back, and then drop it again and again and again while laughing. We humor her, and rejoice that this is very normal baby/toddler behavior, and remember that she probably has never had anyone to play this "game" with her.

After we got on the bus to leave the park, we headed to McDonald's and Pizza Hut for lunch take-out. Dave went to MacDonald's and John went to buy Pizza Hut for his family. Yes, our systems are in shock. So much fast food. But seriously, eating can be very stressful here. Between trying not to drink the water that the waitresses always pour for you, and making sure there is no ice in your soda (yes - soda! My kids are loving this, they never have soda in the states. It is the only thing that we know does not for sure is not made with water from China), and not eating the produce and dishes that have been sitting around for a while, and trying to figure out how to order stuff in Chinese, we have resorted to eating many of our meals at American chain fast food places. Can't wait to get home and eat a nice big salad! We headed to the hotel to eat and take a nap.

Lily sleeps a lot (compared to my other children). She sleeps about 12 hours at night without waking. In the afternoons, she has been sleeping 2-3 hours! I don't have the heart to wake her up in the morning or to wake her from her naps to do stuff. Dave says she has lots of growing to do. I don't go out either when she is sleeping. Dave took the boys to the nearby market in the afternoon to stock up on snacks and get some air. When Lily is sleeping, sometimes she has trouble breathing and will breathe few breaths from her nose, and then have a sudden intake with her mouth. She sleeps through this, but kind of jerks a little when she has to breathe with her mouth. Goodness, I cannot imagine sleeping through that. I cannot wait to have her seen by the cleft team at Stanford. We feel like she has to put so much energy into eating, drinking, and breathing sometimes that this could be another reason she is so thin.

For those who don't know, children with bilateral cleft palate, have 2 clefts in the roof of their mouth. It extends all the way from her gumline to where her soft palate begins. If you put your finger in your mouth and touch the roof, you can feel how far back it is where the soft palate starts. Her palate did not fuse together during the early part of her mother's pregnancy, which resulted in the cleft palate and lip (although she has had surgery for the lip already). Boy, can my girl eat. Can you imagine eating with two openings in the roof of your mouth? Those openings connect to the nasal cavity. She knows just how to push the food far enough back to avoid the clefts. When Lily "talks," it is very nasal - as she her nasal cavity is totally open to her mouth. Dave says that for now the plus side is - no boogers! They just drain directly into the mouth. Ha ha.

We had a sad moment yesterday when Nathan was playing with Lily and looking at her face. He asked what those bumps were on her upper lip? He also noticed that her nostrils are caved in a lot smaller than they should be. I explained that the bumps were the scars from the surgery that put her lip into one piece. He asked, "But are they always going to be there?" Dave and I nodded, and he started to cry :-(. Sweetheart. Dave hugged him and reminded him that the Lord does not care what we look like. We are beautiful in His eyes.

For dinner, we just met John and Judy's family downstairs at the hotel restaurant. It is called Food Street, and it has Chinese dishes from all over China. It is pretty cool because they have examples of each dish on the counter, so you can just point at it and swipe your card. Even though this is a 5 star hotel in the capital of the province of Hunan, that caters to adoptive families - most people do not speak English well. It can be hard to makes your needs known - even for me, and I thought that I could communicate all right in Chinese. We had some dumplings and char siu bao, and fried rice and some stir fried baby bok choy. Lily is eating so much, and I love to feed her and give her whatever she wants. She loves to eat the insided of dumplings, and any kind of bread.

Lastly, one last adventure (for me) to share with you all. I, a mother who has breastfed my first three children exclusively and for literally years, have been preparing bottles of formula! It is not nearly as fun as breastfeeding. I think I finally have it figured out now. We had to make the hole in the silicone nipple bigger so that the liquid could more or less pour out. I have the formula in a drop-in (a bag that goes in the bottle), and while Lily is drinking, I actually squeeze the bag gently. Babies with cleft palate cannot make a vacuum with their mouths when they suck. So while I squeeze, I can help her get the formula. Imagine drinking water with a straw that has a hole in it - I think we have all had this experience. Yes, you can still get your drink, but boy do you have to work hard for it. That is what it is like for Lily to drink from a bottle. It makes me feel a little sad too because I know for most babies - sucking is such a soothing thing. Nursing is so soothing and comforting. I think that for Lily, it is work - and not nearly so pleasurable. I always hold her to give her a bottle, but we always have to stop a few times to let her catch up and get a breath. Hopefully things will get better as I get the hang of this. And of course, after she has her palate surgery!

After bath time, we watched the last part of UP that was on tv. Then off to bed!

Our photos:
First is showing how delicately and lady like Lily is when she eats
Second is showing Lily and Nathan taking a bath together.
Last is a picture of us and John and Judy's family at Martyr's Park

Prayer requests -
1) Continue praying for our family bonding. Lily is growing in attachment :-). There was a moment yesterday when I was out of her view to go to the bathroom, and she looked for me and said, "Ma ma!" Dave said that he could tell she definitely meant me! Yay! However, when we were at the park, and Judy was getting crackers out for her daughter, our Lily reached her hand out to her to get one, too. Judy (smart mama who has done this before) gave the cracker to me, so that I could give it to Lily.
2) Pray for Dave and I as we think about the next steps for Lily when we get home. We have already contacted the doctor at Stanford for an appointment. We really want to get her seen as soon as possible.
3) This is a continuation of #2 - pray for me. I worry about Lily. There is just so much we don't know about her medical history. Sometimes I worry that there will be something else wrong. When I look at her flat head, I worry that we have missed the window for a helmet or some other therapy to help that. It makes me feel sad that she may have missed so many things that could have benefited her had we been able to come and get her sooner. But praise the Lord - you can never miss the window for being loved.
4) We go to Guangzhou tomorrow to finalize more details of the adoption process. Please pray for our safety on the flight and in province.

My girl just woke up! Gotta go. Sorry for the dissertation!

Love,
Chenning

Day #6 - Government Appointments 9/21/11

Hello Friends and Family,

Thank you for rejoicing and celebrating with us as Lily joined our family on Monday! Dave and I are both so encouraged by your replies and your prayers. We feel like Lily is so loved already by people who have not even met her yet. Blessed blessed girl! I really do read each and every reply, and love to hear from all of you. It makes us feel like you are right here with us - which is huge, because it can feel so isolating being in a faraway place.

Yesterday we had to meet Jian downstairs at 8:30. After a breakfast buffet, the driver took us and John and Judy's family to the Civil Affairs Office for our government appointments. Basically, we had to take a family photo, then sign and thumbprint with red ink some documents, and Lily had to do a handprint of both of her hands on the document, too. This made her legally ours! Then we had to be interviewed (it was an easy one! Questions like: When were you married? (Of course, Dave got the date wrong in his answer and I had to correct him!) How many biological kids do you have? Did you know your daughter had cleft lip and palate? Do you mind that she does? Etc.). Oh yes, and pay some fees :-). Lily girl was into everything at the Civil Affairs office - pens, wrappers, paper. Makes this mama's heart smile to see her doing some typical 18 month old stuff.

Then we went back to the hotel to rest. Lily was starting to throw herself backwards, which seemed to me like she was getting tired. The orphanage staff had mentioned that she usually takes a nap at 11am. I slung her and walked around and sung to her, and she fell asleep. I laid her down and she slept for about 2 hours! In the meantime, Dave took the older 2 for a swim in our hotel pool. That was a fiasco. There was no shallow end, and when they got there, Dave didn't quite understand that the attendant there was telling them to use the footbath first, and then that they needed a swim cap. When they came back about 20 minutes later - I was wondering why it was such a quick dip. When Dave filled me in, I kind of felt like laughing. This is the kind of stuff that has been happening to us every day here.

After baths and showers, we met our guide, Jian, and John and Judy's family for dinner. We walked a couple of blocks to eat at the restaurant at the Dolton Hotel. We had some pizza and dumplings and spaghetti. It was so great to be able to eat with this other family. I told you before that they are believers, and we were able to share and fellowship about our adoption journeys and how the Lord has been speaking to each of us. If you remember, please also pray for their new daughter who is also named Lily (!). Her special need is hemangiomas on her face that are associated with something called PHACES syndrome. She is a doll and Dave has looked at her and feels that she has the milder kind. However, of course, you never know, and they could use your prayers. It was funny because Judy keeps telling us that the Lord arranged for them to be in the same group as a dermatologist when their daughter's special need has dermatological findings! We feel like the Lord gave us their company to keep us encouraged, too. As I mentioned in my last e-mail, there are so many things that concern and could cause lots of worry for us about Lily - but she has been so reassuring, having done it before 3 years ago with their older daughter, Grace.

Lily, again, was into everything at dinner. She only stopped when I started feeding her dumplings and fries. All the boys fight to sit next to her on the bus and at mealtimes. We are getting to know her better. She is very lively! She actually spent a lot of yesterday walking with us holding her hands. She likes to play "catch" by rolling a toy to you and then you rolling it back. She was even kicking our blow up balloon we brought. So perhaps she is not as delayed as I thought originally. She really cannot make many different sounds (yet). I am trying to teach her sign language for basic things. She spent the day at my side again, and did not want to go to Dada. Dave is used to this, thank goodness, and actually sees it as a great thing. We had heard about one person being the primary caregiver at the beginning. That way Lily can get attached to someone firmly before widening her circle.

Lily amazes me. It is amazing to me that she is ok with us. It is amazing that she lets me feed her and bathe her and hold her and sleep with her. After just one day of meeting! My bio kids would scream bloody murder at this age being left in the nursery for 10 minutes. So I guess it is amazing to me because it is so foreign to me, but also kind of sad that she never had this. She has laughed a lot, gone through half a box of raisins, loves rice crackers, and bathtime! She splashes and laughs and tosses her bath toys.

Nathan is so cute. He just crept in again and is lying next to sleeping Lily. My men were playing UNO next door, but Nathan has come in twice to see if Lily is still sleeping. I know that God blessed me with such a nurturer of little people for this reason. Nathan has ALWAYS loved babies - even when he was practically a baby himself.

Aaron is doing superbly well! He is very protective of Lily. I know that sometimes you get a honeymoon period before the true emotions come out (that has been the case with each time we had an addition to our family), but I will enjoy it as long as it lasts!

Today - we are sightseeing. I think we are going to Yuelu Academy. We have to wait 2 days until our daughter's documents are processed before we can head to Guangzhou.

The photos! First one is of my 4 kids waiting in the waiting room at the Civil Affairs Office while we were waiting for our turn. The second one is of Dave and I signing the documents - making Lily officially and legally ours! The third one is of me holding Lily after her handprint - notice the red ink. The last one is after naptime when Lily was devouring a box if raisins.

The verse on the back of my Wild Olive tee shirt I am wearing in the photo (Lily is wearing a matching one under her hoodie): "The Lord your God is with you. He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you. He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing." Zephaniah 3:17

Love,
Chenning